Friday, 3 May 2013

Third of May Sensation

Today is third of may , 2 days to go for 13th GE . Every members of my family now gather around and we celebrate it with steamboat as usual. Now everybody can't wait for the 5th of may 〜( ̄▽ ̄〜). Today also the day where the status of UTP application came out , so due to that I try to open the page but the same error occur , I try it over and over again like crazy and I was like "seriously UTP ? you getting on my nerves! ok forget this , aku tak dapat kot .. huarrghh ". I've been waiting so long and suddenly my internet explorer cannot respond with the page , so I just gave up that afternoon and fall asleep . The sense of 'give upness' lingering my soul until I open the page using my brother's lappy and ...............

Ya I successfully open the page ... what do you expect ha?
A month ago , when what I've expect do not come true and a little of inferiority pierce into my heart , I try to gain back my self-trust . Alhamdulillah , it's really wonderful that I can relieved myself by accepting His greater plan that I believed is the better for me.  Followed by the failed of my JPJ test , in one moment I feel like a loser , again , I think by being patient and believed all of His plan will be the best solution . Have you lost so much thing that sometimes you want to pay it back by your success ? . 

This is what I do with UTP application when I'm chosen to be interviewed (still remember this entry : '' Let's just finish this and go to da party '' , said Kinah) . They said it's hard to get in , only 700 out of 5000 will be chosen and that time I was like ''naaah I will not be one of them, for sure maaa" , to make it more dramatically, my rival comes from what I called 'upper class school' and their result is outstanding for me , you know what I mean hahaha . But deep in the bottom of my heart where the space is occupy by 'monster' is shouting ''come kinah you got to be one of them ! " hahaha this self-complexity is difficult to explain to the public haha haha hah. My mission is to challenge myself and show myself that " I can! no matter what ! " (shouting) and to return back a piece of smile of my parent , I want to give them something that they can proud of (even they didn't ask such a thing). 

'' The only failure is not to try. '' - George Clooney
But the greatest challenge is to believe in yourself ! It's not the matter of other people , it's about you . If you can't get your self-trust then there's no point of being somebody , that's what I try to achieve *Hall of fame by The Script ft.Will.I.Am is now playing 〜(^∇^〜) *

Not to say that I already have that self-trust but this thing if I can get it , then I can say "see sakinah , you can dude , come here comrade , we'll set the sail and let's the ship go off the shore ! " .... Sometimes we expect more to other people but we forget to believe in ourselves , I think that is the greatest mistake we often make.

And here the result ... (finally *breath out*)

Alhamdulillah for that chance . And here I wanna story a little about my interviewer whom I found very smart,sweet,lovely,wise and friendly . We got a study case relate to sport and we have to discuss about the government policy which should be apply to resolve the arising problem. They said we have to think outside the box or something like that , critical thinking bla bla bla (it's not hard as what I told la , take it easy dude). When the time comes to me to be interviewed , this is what happen . Even this is not the real dialogue , but this is the point of which I remember , the interviewer has many times respond to my point and ask something, and I'm not that 'kind of ' fluent :

Me : I think the roots of all this problem is the mentality of the society itself , and this mentality is come from our educational system which is exam oriented system . I mean look at USA , they produce a lot of athlete and Japan also, their educational system come from every aspect , they're not only focus on academic to fulfill the market demand . The government has to shift the paradigm of our educational system .

Interviewer : But as you know our government and japan government is different , they often change the government but we still with one government , so to make that change is quite difficult . That's the reality we should look on before go with the solution.

Me : ( dalam hati : wow!! you got my point !! you really got my billion of respect !! LOL) aaa yaa , that's the problem haha ha ha (not sure to laugh or to be serious) but the policy is futile if we can't do something with the roots of the problem ... bla bla bla bla bla..

And that's what I called the sweetest moment in the UTP that day hahahahaha ! . We're ask to think outside the box but now I think I can get into the box (jail).

My classmate , yap kian yeap also got the offer , and only both us from our school apply for UTP for this year , proud of us yap *lap air mata* . He will accept the offer and be UTPian in no time. Foundation program for 1 year , if you got 3.5 and above , the chance for getting Petronas scholarship is high. The chance of you to be like Rafizi Ramli is also high hahahaha ( adore him wooo).

gambar ehsan dari google 
My inferiority said it was 'nasib' , even it's actually 'rezeki' , but what I truly want to say is "yeaay we got it sakinah as expected from us !" .

# Our self-trust is far more important than any of the offer dude.

Yeah, you can be the greatest , You can be the best  , You can be the King Kong banging on your chest 
 - Hall of fame 
Allah Allah Allah